The Dangerous Mind of Dan Luke

So you all have offered quite a bit of feedback and support through your comments this past year on the old Blogspot site and I am very appreciative of that. It was originally intended that all of your comments be transferred to this new site and the corresponding posts that you commented on but, due to the fact that I have parted ways with my previous collaborator/webmaster, this is looking somewhat unlikely (that is until I get a better understanding of Wordpress, which may take some time).

That is not to say that it is impossible, but for the moment it has to be set on the backburner so that I can concentrate on new content.  So let this serve as a reference and some sort of pansyass tribute to all of you beautiful, succulent people with tender skin that have supported me through this entire process!  And to the many, many people that have hated on me:  As always, go fuck yourself.

Click ‘Read More’ to find your (and others) comments!

An Introduction

THE Nick Ginger? said…

Dan, I dont think I have to tell you how pleased I am that you’ve started a new blog. Since I was one of your loyal Xanga readers back two or some odd years ago. FINALLY my interent usage can be used for something other than facebook and pornography!
God bless you Daniel and America!

I, Man.

scott said…

ill comment… faggot.

Brandon Rizzo said…

i second scotts emotion
thanks SMokey…

“B”

15 Seconds of Fame

Ashley B said…

Don’t worry dan, I’ve always thought of you as more of a Harold than a Kumar.

Good fight story, sounds like you both got your asses kicked.

Caitlyn said…
rudolph….stanley…….adam
did they even exist at cletus
because i have no memory of them
THIS STORY IS FILLED WITH LIES!

Dan Luke said…
Anne M. Jeans.

Ana said…
hahahahahahahahah! hahah.

Give My Reguards to James Frey

Brandon Rizzo said…

ahh yes chicks do like to ask if you can makre thme orgasm without touching them…

well put
“B”

Nick Ginger said…

I believe you Dan. IN FACT, if I were to make a suggestion for a writing topic.
Do you remember the time when we took the green line all the way to the end down to the south-central, south side. Fried chicken? Bullet holes? Black lesbians macking on a bus stop bench?
Im sure there is a story in there somewhere…

Procrastination on a deadline weekend

scott said…

so i have sooooo much homework to do, but instead i read your blog which inspired me to just surf the web. lifes great.

Anonymous said…

Haha two things… Colombia? High school was not very nice to you when it came to spelling the name of your future college.

#2: I’ll be your white wife who will cook you eggs, because you can’t eat eggs can you? So you would just die and I could take all your money.

- Ashley

P.S. Did she ever call you? You left us hanging

Ana said…

all scott ever has to say lately is how he has “soooooooooo much homework to do.” hahahaha.

TELEMUNDO GIRLS!!!! haha. love it.

Anonymous said…

I dunno Dan, I think I’m disappointed in you. In this blog. In this night. In this weather. In the dinner I had. The least you could have done would be to give me a blog worth reading to spare me from the disappointment I feel about the other aspects of this night…you didn’t even tell us why you’re friends were laughing! No doubt its because Marylin thinks you’re a pansy, but then again, perhaps not, considering MOST of your blogs make me wanna do you. But I won’t lie, tonight not so much. So, dId she call?

The Fall of Dan Luke
Clara said...

lol i still think ur the best

jesus said…

i think this is the best update yet, so stop crying or ill get my dad to do something bad.

Nick Ginger said…

Dan, I was having a bad day up until I read the poem at the beginning of your blog… Kristina Koffee was probably one of the most rational, kind, and potentially successful people that attended Hinsdale South. As you are well aware of course.

Nick Ginger.. again… said…

I think I will follow her “madow” as we all should… GO COLLEGE!

Brandon Rizzo said…

hmmm Dan im gunna need you to run a back-log on this entry, then formalize and tender your resignation, but before that run c41 86 test on the subprotocals then interlap the subnets please…

thanks

So it Goes.
Anonymous said…

“And the cashier with about ten thousand piercings goes, “You mean Kurt Cobain.”
And you go, “No, CURTIS KOBBIN. FROM NERVANE-AH, HE DID THAT ONE SONG… WHAT WAS IT AGAIN? SMELLS LIKE TEENAGERS?”"

I still remember standing in line for Cursive and watching that girl cry so hard when you said that joke.

It still gets me every time.

Ana said…

dan luke i cant wait until you write a million best sellers and i can sit and read them and revel at how clever and zany my favorite asian is.

The One Month Anniversary of Dangerous Mind
Anonymous said…

“I’m all for women empowerment: Women can be empowered to do my laundry.”

I thought this journal was supposed to be original, not ripping material off of school video book report projects. shame on you dan luke

Anonymous said…

BAHAHAHAHAHA OWNED

Glo said…

that was from me by the way. the bahaha i didnt know how to put a name on it

Anonymous said…

Uh. That wasn’t ripped off any video book report projects, it’s from Film Club Chronicles which he wrote.

On Addictions and the Interweb
Anonymous said…

haha I can so see you dancing with a flute in the forest for a bunch of little wildlife creatures who are in a circle. Dan Luke your writing is funny, true, inspiring, and delicious.

~ Steve-o

btw -I hate that Waldo prick. He makes me so frustrated that sneaky lil pisser…

B dont cal me spaghettin Rizzo said…

i resent the Jew statement on second thought i resent this post…

shakalakadaka

On the Subject of Emo Modeling Pictures
Anonymous said…

Why are you a KY jelly model?

I know you’re fantastically gorgeous, but where’d that come from? haha

Anonymous said…

For some odd reason,this was my favorite entry.

On Tyra Banks, Lily Allen, and Legitimate Crusades
Sean said…

Hahahaha, that’s hilarious. I also thought the tags were hilarious. I mean, come on, My Little Pony? Awesome.

brando said…

ur outta control

Ryan said…

hilarious. no other word to describe it

Bible Camp
tokenazn said…

I kinda liked this one…but sometimes it’s hard to interpret what’s real with what’s not in your writing. that’s just you, but it confuses me sometimes. i love you though.

Gloria said…

I like this one. mostly the 2nd half. it bothers me that you like masterbation so much ewwwwwww

Nick Ginger said…

Don’t listen to Gloria, Dan… She’s just in denial over her own delight in chronic masterbation… But this is a really interesting piece. I always like to hear reactions against those born-again Christian weirdos..

BRando said…

24 nice

Michigan Must Die
Riz said…

that entry waS Smoove Dan

This Just in!
Ana said…

the image of you “dropping it like it’s hot” is too much to handle. hahaha.

B said…

wow you are ridiculous….

but seriously how much is a ride on the big cock express cuz i use to get free ones…

On Pride, Prejudice, and Kung Fu.
Jimmy said…

Love your blog Dan, keep it up haha.

Ana said…

dude. im siting at a cafe reading this and laughing soooooooo hard. and everyone’s staring at me. hahahaha. i love you dan luke!

Sammy!!!! (Asian) said…

Awesome entry. Haha, I still remember when I met you in freshmen year and comming to your house. This really brought back some memories haha. Dan, you rock. We need to hang out.

Sean said…

Haha Dan, I know what you mean about being raised with all that estrogen. It’s EXACTLY like what you described.

Maddie said…

Loooved this one Dan

At World’s End
Anonymous said…

Thank you Dan Luke for writing this soooo insanely true blog.fo realz,I completely agree and could not have said it better.

plus it totally gave me something to read while im ditching sociology.

Anonymous said…

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/pirates_of_the_caribbean_3/

pg-13. I win, you owe me a blowjob.
~Dan
yes, its 614, i’m going to bed now

Teenage Angst Has Paid off Well
B said…

nice bauer moves and your voice sounds incredibly gay

Ana said…

fridayyy?!?!?! i better see you again before you leave!!

Ana said…

p.s. you look so little in that video!!! and wow. yeah that video is just wow. hahaha.

That One Time When Dan Luke Posted on The Dangerous Mind of Dan Luke Stoned Out of His Mind.
Sean said…

Wow, that was good for a laugh this late at night. I seriously laughed my ass off at the “screaming in agony” part.

Mama, Won’t You Keep Those Castles in The Air & Burning?
Anonymous said…

666♥Eric

Tokyo: A Story Through Movies.
Anonymous said…

Ahaha..your grandma is funny. Your still my hero.

–Beth

Anonymous said…

Your Grandma said shit. Wanna be related?

Sharp Gun

Anonymous said…

haha i love crazy azn grandma

HES AN ENGRISH MAJOR!

haha I love you.

Anonymous said…

and your dad is sexy… he says mmm mmm after we’re done

Bidet: Trial and Error.
B said…

that was hilarious

Anonymous said…

HAHHAHA!!!
i love bidet’s…
my bag says i have a frog in my bidet…

Anonymous said…

pretty hot

Dan & Dan Do Japan 2: The Fish Holocaust (Ft. Andrew W.K.)
Dan Luke said…

Funny to think that there’s another Dan Luke out there with a dangerous mind too.

Dan Luke said…

I uh. I don’t know what this means, but sure.

Give My Reguards to the Dead Hippies in the Trunk of My Car.
Anonymous said…

I love you and your gay little journal

Classical Composer of the Month: Andrew W.K.
Sean said…

Hahaha oh wow. That was pretty subtle.

Fuck Michael Bay.
Nicholas Ginger said…

Miami Vice is my favorite movie.

your mom said…

me no likey this one

Burn)ALL said…

I’ll fuck a deep blue hues… nothing can make martin lawrence a good actor though.

Questions.
Anonymous said…

You’re almost as insane as I am.

Dan Luke

Anonymous said…

You’re almost as insane as I am.

Dan Luke

Mike Hunt said…

Dude, I was THERE. I saw that Asian chick’s dick, too! High five, bro!

Pizza Love.
Anonymous said…

dan this erotic food for thought is truley provacative and charmingly quintessential! now im gunna go shuve a fat cucumber in my twat and watch re runs of loney toons in my suburban efficiancy apartmant alone!

BURNAL!!!!!!!!! said…

haha… i think we wrote this one in my car.

On Pride, Prejudice, and Kung Fu (FINAL DRAFT)
Steve? said…

It’s Douglas FIR Dan. It’s not a fucking mammal.

Also, paragraph 61, “we need to break of the labels”? What does that even mean? You call this a final draft?

Otherwise, I love this essay and always have.

Daniel-Kevin Luke said…

Racial Labels.

Anonymous said…

your blog is not fun to read

pecker wood said…

sweet blurb bro! isn’t that what they call them blurbs right? or is it blog? any how sweet blurb your right asains are cool. isn’t it true that asain chicks have sideways twats? you should write a blurb about that

The Pussy and the Back Pube
Ana said…

haha. i love the heartening ending.

and as per usual, very entertaining read overall.

The Homeless Man of Your Dreams.
Jimmy said…

This story has changed my life, and makes me reflect on my encounters with the unwealthy people of the streets.

On Good and Evil
Ana said…

this is probably one of my favorites.

How to Shave A Face
D.C. Hobson said…

i feel like both the overall smoothness of my face and my chances with women have increased at least 24% from this helpful information. looking forward to see more videos like this!

The 1st Anniversary of Dangerous Mind.
Jimmy said…

Looking forward to it.

ferron said…

no bacon?

Dr. Ginger said…

good work sir…

it’s been cool to see your writings and other things grow over the years since our high school days at south…

now i have two words for you..

GUEST BLOGGER –> NICK GINGER
think about it.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
Kyle Coleman said…

i deff. want one of those crystal skulls!!

Peter said…

” Spielberg is sitting in his chair reading the latest draft of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull when he comes across the word “EXPLOSION” he squeals in delight and screams “WHEEEEEEEEEE,” as he tosses the pages up into the air and begins to frantically spin in his swirl chair, frantically waving his arms in the air like a hyperactive child.”

LOL

good review!

Filed under: Season 2, Supplemental, WTF