Miley CyrusMiley Cyrus is ridiculously hot.  Seriously, I think it is unfair for anyone under the age of fifteen to be that hot.  She’s like some kind of demented fucked up work from God that mankind was not ready to handle.  So when she was handed a digital camera it should have been known to lead to disasterously sexy results.

Yet – here I am – tweleve hours later and I am still salavating at these risque Miley Cyrus pictures.  I want to fly in through her window at night and then hold her in my biceps as I breastfeed her until the break of dawn.  Just like… you know, in a nurturing way and shit.

It’s getting to the point that every time I even think about her bare shoulders on the cover of Vanity Fair or her totally hot MySpace pics my penis frantically jabs at the zipper of my pants.

I don’t think it’s fucked up.  What?  Looking at pictures of fifteen year olds makes me some sort of degenerate pervert? Bullshit. America, at the very least you owe me your underaged chicks.  As far as I’m concerned Chris Hanson is just a cock-blocker.

This double standard that we live with is ridiculous.  Where we can comment and point judgmental fingers at sleezy pictures of underage chicks, but the moment someone remarks that said enticing photo is “hot,” they are labeled a pervert.  So what is it America?  Are we to censor all forms of sexual commentary when it comes to minors?  Or just when it suits us?  Because it seems like everyone is thinking that Miley wouldn’t have taken these pictures if she wasn’t a horny tween sex kitten desperately grasping for our attention.

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